There’s something unexpected that’s been happening to me as the superintendent. I’m wondering if it happens to all superintendents or if it’s an ingrained part of the culture here at RCS. I’m wondering if it’s something I’m doing or not doing that’s perpetuating the problem.
I think I’m clear, honest, straightforward and forth coming with faculty, staff, students and parents. Nope–I don’t just think that, I make a conscious decision to be clear, honest, straightforward and forth coming. I notice in this position that sometimes I have a conversation with someone, they walk away from the conversation and then come back wondering things like “did you mean to say?” or “were you subtly trying to tell me . . .?” or “are you trying to end this program?” (I know I have friends right now reading this who are thinking “subtlety–Kim?”)
How does this speculation happen? “Say what you mean and mean what you say”–that’s it for me, words to live by. No subterfuge, no hidden agenda, no secret plans, no ulterior motives. It’s always worked for me through a zillion interactions, friendships and jobs. Why now do I get this sort of “assumed” intent? If you want to know something, ask. I’ll give the best answer I know and I’ll tell you if I don’t know. Doesn’t that seem like a simple, straightforward approach that works?
What would happen in our school system if every time we interact with someone: a student, a colleague, a parent, an administrator and/or a community member, we make the conscious decision to give that person the benefit of the doubt, take him at his word, and think the best of her? Base our decisions about a topic or an issue or a person on what we’re witnessing face to face instead of on what we hear through second or third parties? And if we wonder about a person’s motive or answer or action, we could actually ask that person for clarification instead of making assumptions or asking someone else. That’s how we’ll build trust and a solid RCS team.
We have an incredible school community with wonderful, hard working people who come here every day to do the best that we can do for our kids. I give my word that I will ask questions, consider lots of possibilities, analyze and research before making the best decisions that I can, with you. I also give my word that you’ll know what I’m thinking–just ask, don’t wonder or worse, worry. I’ll own my decisions, I won’t blame them on someone else, even though I do consider what others think in making them. I’ll listen to you and if you present a different point of view, I’ll gladly consider it. I may not do what you want me to do, but I’ll truly hear you. I’ll work hard to think the best of you, to give you the benefit of the doubt. And if I wonder if you’re bringing your best, I’ll ask you. No hidden agenda, no subterfuge, no working in isolation, no subtleties that I hope you catch. Direct, honest, straight forward.
Give me the benefit of the doubt and I’ll do the same for you. Think about that expression–when in doubt, we’re consciously deciding to give the other person the benefit. Sounds like a plan to me. What do you think?