Tag Archives: Positive Outcomes

The Best Nurses Are Like our Best Teachers

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As we’ve settled into this strange routine at Childrens’ Hospital, I’m left thinking about this world that we’re living in. I’m thinking about the surgeons who take the time to answer all of our questions and to talk directly to our son. And I’m thinking a lot about the litany of nurses coming through our lives this week. Actually, we’re visitors in their lives as we live where they work.

Some barely make an imprint, just doing their jobs, efficiently and effectively. Others make an extra effort to ask a question or to notice something about my son. One nurse took me on a tour, two days in, to show me where I could go to get Tallon another juice or a popsicle, something I wish someone had done on the first day. Still another nurse printed information on spleen injuries for me, which I especially appreciated because I like to know as much about something like this as possible. And the best was the nurse we had the second night in who just showed so much tenderness that my son wished for her again.

Just like teaching, there are those in nursing who passed almost anonymously through our lives and those who left an imprint. How simple it was for them to spend just an extra minute and leave us feeling so much better. Showing us that they cared enough to SEE my son, not just another patient in room 910, made a difference to us.

This is exactly the same as what our best teachers do. They see my child, all of him, and they show him that they care who he is. The best teachers, like the best nurses, aren’t afraid to show they care, that they’re interested more in the kid than the task.

G-Town Wrestlers Rock

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For the last ten hours of this beautiful Saturday, I sat in the gym at Iroquois High School for a wrestling tournament and it was worth every minute of it. Wrestling is, by far, my favorite school sport. Granted, I went to school in Pennsylvania where every boy worth his salt at that time wrestled and carried a can of snuff in his back pocket, so it’s sort of ingrained in my subconscious. Our neighbor, Wayne German, was the wrestling coach at Plum High School and he used to drag me along to the meets. Anyone ever coached by Mr. German knows what the meaning of “heart” is.

There were a ton of wrestlers today and only a handful of parents (not too many want to sit there for 10 hours), but what a terrific day for sportsmanship. Wrestling is an interesting sport because a kid can win individually, even if the team loses. Still, I watched kid after kid run from one mat to the next to watch his teammate’s match. They’re polite and easy to be around. They look out for each other. Real athletes pushing it to the max. Heck, a kid can lose, show a ton of heart and still come off the mat feeling good about himself because he fought hard and gave it 100% until the end.

The moment worth the price of admission came when one of our rookies got his first pin. The grin on the kid’s face when he came up from the mat and the reaction of his teammates were fantastic–brought tears to my eyes. The coach ran himself ragged running from bout to bout, but he never stopped coaching and supporting every kid.

Yeah it was a great way to spend a Saturday, in a smelly gym filled with adolescent boys all treating each other with respect. Win or lose, those kids were as good as it gets today.

Pass It On

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Our Building Improvement Team is made up of teachers, support staff, parents, community members, students, and me. We have a generosity drive each year, where our students and staff raise money to help make the holidays better for a few area families.

I received the coolest phone call ever from one of our families from last December. Seems they went shopping, bought about five bags of toys, and want us to distribute them to a needy family this year. As it turns out, they’re having a much better year this holiday season and they want to give back. That’s the best example of generosity I could possibly hope for—not a phone call asking if we can help them out again–but one that says “it’s our turn to help someone else”.

Woman to Woman

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My daughter, Bryna, is nineteen years old. I’ve always been conscious of the need for positive role models in her life. I’ve encouraged her to form relationships with her grandmothers, her aunt, my very dear friend Tina, and other strong women in our lives.

The girls I know spend a lot of time imagining who they will become one day. As a teacher for eleven years, and now as a building principal for seven, I’m always aware of my role as a possible example of a healthy, happy, strong adult. Too many of the young women we work with don’t see a happy adult and value themselves too little. Maybe it’s being aware of this lack for other kids that’s caused me to look for role models for my own daughter.

I think the thing I’ve said most often to our young women who are considering dropping out of school is,

“You need to get a diploma so that you can be strong and take care of yourself and your kids. So that you never have to rely upon anyone else. You need to always be able to point to the door when your significant other treats you beyond reason and say ‘there’s the door’. You never want to have to stay in a bad situation because you can’t take care of yourself financially.”

Helping to raise strong young women in our community has been important to me for as long as I can remember. It’s part of what motivated me to enter the teaching profession in the first place.

I’m glad to see my daughter spend this week in Pittsburgh with the best role model I know.  My mom, Donna Lee, has always been my strongest supporter, the person who’s always believed in me and expected the best of me. She raised me to be independent, to make my own decisions, to make the most of every day. I’m happy for her influence and time with my other strong supporter, Bryna.

Whether related or not, we need to support each other. And we need to seek out those young women who are still deciding who they’ll be one day and help them to figure it out.

Rachel’s Challenge at G-Town

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We have only one or two major assemblies per year, because I really try to guard instructional time. I receive requests for assemblies and meetings and pictures–interruptions–weekly. One of our assemblies is the “G-Town Show Down”, an annual program that is the culminating event for our positive schoolwide behavior management program. We feature student and teacher acts and it’s a blast.

For our other assembly this year, I’m pleased to welcome Rachel’s Challenge to our schools on December 1. We will host a middle school assembly in the morning, a meeting for student leaders mid-day, a high school assembly in the afternoon, and a free to the public community presentation at 7:00 that evening.

I have written about Rachel’s Challenge previously, as I attended the assembly at Silver Creek Central to check it out. If you’re an educator please go to the Rachel’s Challenge website and consider it for your school.  If you are a member of our Gowanda community, please join us at 7:00 pm on December 1 in our auditorium. I left this assembly at Silver Creek Central feeling like everything we do makes a difference and I can’t wait for our students to learn that too.

G-Town Salutes the Armed Forces

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Our Fall Band Concert was tonight for grades 5-12. As always, it was wonderful–everything from fifth graders who have been playing for three months to a terrific jazz band that includes three of our teachers. The auditorium was packed and everyone seemed to enjoy the concert. Our music programs have always helped G-Town shine the brightest.

I’ve worked in four districts over my eighteen years in education and we have something that happens at our Fall concert that I think is unique to G-Town. At the beginning of our concerts, our concert choir performs the National Anthem and the members of our local American Legion and VFW participate with a presentation of Colors. The concert concludes with the Armed Forces Salute and as our 9-12 Band plays, each flag is presented. Members of our audience who have served stand as their flag is presented. It is unusual and inspiring.

It’s unusual because it takes our 5-12 concert and turns it into a community event. It’s inspiring because it teaches every child in attendance that our veterans, our country, and our flag are meant to be honored and respected. The presentation and removal of Colors is a formal and serious part of our concert, and it teaches our students something important about service and about patriotism.

It also teaches each of us that we’re part of something much bigger than our school community, and that’s a good place to be.

What’s love got to do with it?

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I’ve been thinking about disagreements this week. Arguments, fights, misunderstandings. I realize something that I’m not sure I’ve ever fully understood before now. Whenever my husband and I have had disagreements over our twenty years of marriage, I’ve always known that I was more important to him than the argument.

Think about that idea. Because I’m not sure I could always say the same thing. Sometimes I think the fight became more important to me than he was. Not ultimately, obviously, but in the moment. Yet somehow I always knew with Derek, I was more important than the fight. That shouldn’t be interpreted that he didn’t hold his ground in an argument or articulate his point of view. But through any disagreement, I knew I was more important to him than anything we were discussing.

I consider the mediation that occurs in our offices. Guidance, the county’s social worker, our Dean of Students, me–we’re often trying to help two parties work something out. Dan, our Dean of Students, and I spent about five hours on one ridiculous disagreement between students this week and I know he spends countless hours more with other disagreements. It’s almost always a stupid fight between kids who “used to be” friends. What would happen if everyone could approach arguments valuing each other more than the fight?

This seems particularly important with people who are close, especially in the same family. That’s where the passion in a fight often explodes. And that’s where we should most value each other, more than whatever argument is at hand. I don’t know about you, but when I reflect on the arguments and disagreements I’ve had with the people I love most, they almost always seem absurd in hindsight.

So I’m going to give it a try. The next time I feel angry with someone, or frustrated, or hurt, I’m going to look at the person, see why I care about her, and realize that she is more important than the issue about which we’re angry. I hope my children can learn their father’s approach: that the person standing on the other side is much more important than the fight in between.

Fringe benefits

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So I’m realizing this blogging gig has some fringe benefits that I didn’t expect. One of G-Town’s readers and a frequent commenter is Lisa, who happens to be my college roommate. Lisa and I graduated over twenty years ago. We’ve remained friends through a lot of life’s changes, seeing each other every couple of years. We are both busy working moms and we talk only once in a while. Blogging has given us a new way to connect.

Here’s the interesting thing about this blogging connection. Lisa isn’t an educator; she’s a human resource manager. Often she has commented about how similar a topic in one of my posts is to something she’s been thinking about. That makes sense because we both manage, and hopefully motivate, employees. The best part is that it’s inspired Lisa to create her own human resources blog, and now I get to go and read what’s on Lisa’s mind.

I’ve always thought of my audience as those in the school community, other principals, teachers, students, and community members. Now I realize it may also include other professionals, connecting us to a much broader audience, one with an important voice. I hope that what I’m writing reflects positively on public education.

Imagine if it actually could influence thinking about who we are as educators, what public school is really like, and what a tremendous profession it can be for young people making career choices. And if it can influence thinking in the private sector. Thanks for adding your voice to the conversation Lisa. I can’t wait to read you and see what I can learn.

R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to me. . .

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I think teenagers get a bad rap sometimes. We took a trip to the Mall yesterday. My son is fourteen and I heard him ask his nineteen-year old sister if she remembered reaching the age where everyone looks at you as if you’re about to steal something from them. She agreed unequivocally, stating that there are two stores that she won’t enter to this day because of the way she was treated when she shopped there as a young teen. She said the saleswomen were rude, refused to help her, and made her feel like less than she was.

Now I understand that retail outlets have good reason to pay attention to teenagers because shoplifting is a problem that results in profit loss. I also remember from my old “retail” days when I managed convenience stores followed by pharmacies, that employee and vendors’ theft add up to a much more significant loss. But I also remember being taught to treat customers with the utmost respect to the point where when I saw an older woman stick something in her coat, I offered her a basket to keep it in and then showed her to the register.

Why then, are teenagers approached with such suspicion? Because a percentage of teenagers (just like adults) are less than reputable, certainly doesn’t mean we need to treat all kids as if they are ill intended.

I wonder how this translates to how we treat teenagers as they enter our schools. Certainly, it goes back to expectations once again. When we treat students with respect and dignity, they meet our expectations. Likewise, if we treat them with suspicion and disregard, they may decide they’d rather not return to our school at all. It probably also explains why some parents avoid school, poor treatment in school as a child stays in a person’s mind for a very long time.

Let’s make sure we’re not doing anything that causes someone to avoid our school at all costs, like my daughter who won’t ever return to a store at the Mall. We can’t afford to lose anyone’s business.

I accept Rachel’s Challenge

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     Along with two of our guidance counselors, Beth and Jennifer, I went to see an assembly at a neighboring school today. It’s called Rachel’s Challenge and you can check it out at their website. This was Rachel Scott’s story, as told through video and a family friend, Derek Kilgore. As described on Rachel’s Challenge,

Rachel Scott was the first person killed at Columbine High School on April 20, 1999. Her acts of kindness and compassion coupled with the contents of her 6 diaries have become the foundation for one of the most life-changing school programs in America – Rachel’s Challenge.
Attending this assembly was an amazing experience as an adult.  I can only imagine what it feels like for our students.  Rachel talked through her journals, essays, and friends about starting a chain reaction of compassion. I found her story, her character, her spirit to be inspirational and an excellent reminder of the difference one person can make.
     I returned to G-Town thinking about my daily interactions with students and teachers and how important they are, not to be taken for granted. I try to stand in the hallways between class periods, every time the bell rings, just like thousands of teachers across the country. I stand out there to supervise, to model that for my teachers, and to see our students. After this assembly, I realize how important my behavior is at that moment and at others. How important it is to make contact with every student, to greet each kid, to smile and acknowledge him or her. I realize that the small things we do make a difference too. One interaction at a time.
     Rachel’s Challenge was the kind of assembly program I want my own children to participate in and we’ll work hard to find a way to bring it to Gowanda. Rachel Scott touched my heart today and I accept Rachel’s Challenge to look for the best in others, to set goals and write about them, to choose my influences and to make them positive, to use kind words, and to start a chain reaction in G-Town.